02 February, 2010

From the Vault: "Mr. Helpful" strikes again!

A former member Posted May 27, 2008 6:44 PM

I am an Architect from India relocating (within a month) to Bucharest on a contract of one year . I need to know everything there is to know about the place, the good , the bad and also the ugly. Please kindly take away a few precious moments to help me out.

Ken H. Posted May 27, 2008 11:25 PM

Architecture in Bucharest is the second best planned agency in the city, just after traffic control. Why, with the right bribes to the right ministries, you can build anything you damn well please, without the need for all that tedious research into the impact against public utilities or parking, let alone anything as intangible as quality-of-life. Will the land under the outgoing 1-floor house support the incoming 30-floor office? Will you sever the neighborhood's underground water and electric conduits to dig your foundation? Will the adjacent homes ever see sunshine again? What will 60 new offices do to the parking demand in the vicinity? Who knows? Who cares? Try it and find out! By the time anyone complains, the money's long paid and the addresses long changed.

"No, really, domnule, self-collapsing ceilings are the latest trend! Easy cleaning, and you should get to know your neighbors better, anyway!"

Your average new office building designed for 200 or more people usually contains underground parking for 8 cars, (if by "car" you mean "Vespa") and enough pressure for heat and water to reach nearly halfway up the building! Will your toilet actually empty when you flush it? It's nearly the same odds as Las Vegas, but without all those nasty free drinks and naked showgirls. So come on down and jump in, why let all the local designers have all the fun?

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